Christmas Break 12/30/11

I can't believe that December (and 2011) is almost over!!!!  I have been up in Chicago for the last three days spending a late Christmas with my family.  Both my wig and my bald head were a big hit.  It always feels good to get the thumbs up from your mom and your sisters.  It's funny that no matter how old you get, you still care what your mom thinks!  I have been feeling pretty good and I have gotten used to my bald head just fine.  I am looking forward to a few more days of vacation before coming back to work.  I can't believe that my next round is coming up in less than a week.  I dread it, but at least I will be half done already!

What a day -12/26/11

So today was a little overwhelming, but I survived, just like all of the other tough days.  It started by being able to pull tufts of hair out of my head with merely a gently tug and I knew the inevitable had arrived.  Then in the afternoon we went to watch "We Bought a Zoo" -- a movie that I expected to be inspiring and uplifting and I cried through almost the entire thing.  I don't want to ruin the movie for anyone, but Matt Damon and his two children are six months out from losing their wife and mother to breast cancer.  It was so difficult for me to watch them grieve and struggle to move on and be happy again--pretty much my greatest fears coming to life on the big screen.  The day ended with my husband shaving my head.  We both agree that it was one of the hardest things we've ever had to do.  I'm not going to lie-I had teardrops falling on my accumulating pile of hair on the floor.  But now that it's done, I feel a huge sense of relief and my head looks much better than I expected.  And I have to say, I look a lot more the same than I do different, and that makes me happy.

Friday 12/23-feeling great!

I ended up having such a great day yesterday!  I felt so good, had lots of energy, and was so productive.  It was probably more like a normal day before I started this crazy ride, but I think I can just appreciate my health and energy so much more now after hitting an all-time low.  I am so thankful to be feeling better for the holidays.  I hope I can express enough appreciation for everyone's cards and prayers.  Some of my favorites have been coming from my brother-in-law's 98 year old grandma in the form of EMAILS.  It's not only the wisdom and beautiful excerpts she has been sharing, it's further inspiration to get through this and make it to 98.  Thank you to all who have taken my story and my needs to your prayer groups.  I hope everyone reading has such a wonderful holiday with their families.  Enjoy and appreciate your time together!

Thursday 12/22

I have to go in for lab work today to keep track of my blood cell counts.  The chemo nurse told me that Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday of this week would be my most susceptible time for infection since my white blood cell count would be at my lowest.  Hopefully the Neulasta shot will keep me healthy.  I've been washing my hands very carefully too.
I had a great visit with my parents.  It was nice to have some company and we went on a drive to see Christmas lights, watched the boys play basketball, and finished up some Christmas shopping.  I am feeling somewhat back to normal and I hope it continues for the next two weeks, although I guess losing my hair isn't exactly the definition of "normal!"  I am getting nervous and yet strangely curious about being bald.  I haven't noticed any hair loss except normal shedding yet but my scalp is still itching and sensitive so I'm sure it's inevitable.  I just hope my head doesn't look like Sloth from the Goonies!  :)

One week after chemo

This process has been such a time warp.  I can't believe it's been a week since my first treatment, and yet each day felt so long when I was feeling crummy.  I am happy to report feeling pretty good.  I have been napping every day and taking medicine for some mild nausea, but overall, I'm doing fairly well.

12/19/11 Update

Well, I am hanging in there but this is no fun.  I would definitely say that the worst is over for this treatment round, but it seems like something new is bothering me every day.  My newest complain is diarrhea (sorry, but it's true) and a very sore tongue.  The good news is that Imodium works well for the stomach issues but I was up on and off last night with a stomachache.  I have some cute quotes from my boys from last night.  I was talking to them about my hair, and J.R. said, "Cancer sucks worse than the Colts."  Brady was so sweet when he said, "Don't you wish you could ask Santa to not have cancer so you wouldn't have to take that bad medicine so you wouldn't lose your hair?"  I asked both of them if they were going to shave their heads too, and Brady said (who is extremely vain about his hair) "No, but I'll get a trim!"  Too funny.
Thank you Barb for the delicious meal last night, it hit the spot.  I am happy to say that my parents are coming for a couple of days to help around the house and keep the boys entertained.  I look forward to the company. 

Good day after all

Today ended up being a much better day than I expected.  I got to see J.R.'s basketball game and I even kept the stats for the coach.  I went home and took a nap and then went out with my husband for almost four hours.  It was very low key, but just getting out into the real world feels like a big success.  I hope that the worst day is over for this round!